Learning Thai – Mark V
There are many people in the world who find it easy to learn a new language. I have a friend, Shaun, who is in that category. He speaks virtually fluent Thai and can read and write it. He even reads the Thai newspapers. Then there are those like myself who struggle with another lingo, who could never learn this tonal language in a gazillion years. I have more chance of learning ancient Aramaic from an alcoholic Russian with a strong Glaswegian accent.
I have tried, believe me. After my first holiday here in 1979, Thailand became an obsession of sorts and I couldn’t wait to return. I thought it would enhance the experience considerably to learn the language, so I purchased two books, one called ‘Easy Thai’ (yeah, right!) the name of the other escapes me. It was something simple like ‘Learning Thai’ and was a deadly earnest tome. It was first printed in the 1940’s when of course they had a rather different way of putting things. The introduction explained about the tones and the vast number of consonants and vowels. It finished with a paragraph explaining that while study of the lessons in this book were useful, (and I’m not making this up) the best way to learn the language is to have as much intercourse with the Thais as possible.
I think the word ‘intercourse’ in the 40’s meant talking to, interacting with, but I took no chances anyway and fully embraced their advice.
After many years, I have great command of what is known as ‘Taxi Thai’ which means you have enough of a grasp of the language to tell a taxi driver, ‘left here, straight on and where the ****! are you going! to get to your destination.
What defeats me is the tones. Take the word ‘Mai’ it has 5 different meanings depending on the tone. For example; ‘Is the wood burning? No, the new silk is burning’ is Mai mai mai? Mai, mai mai mai.’
Simple really. Another good one is ‘Glai’ which means near and ‘Glai’ which means far. Ask your Thai friend to pronounce both and see if you can hear the difference.
The subtlety of the tone is what gets me. When I had my business in Bangkok I had a sales girl called Moy. No-one had corrected my tone until I was telling my ex-missus (we are still great friends) about her and she burst out laughing. “What’s her name again?” she said, “Moy” I replied. More laughter. It turns out that I had been calling her ‘pubic hair’ for 3 months, with people being too polite to correct me.
The tone is all important. If you do not pronounce the word exactly to a Thai they don’t know what you are talking about. Unlike westerners they don’t seem to be able to guess what you mean from the context of the other words. As an example, if I was in London and a tourist asked me ‘Where is Piladiccy Circus please?’ My brain (as well as yours did just now) made that quantum leap in a fraction of a second that what they mean is Piccadilly Circus and you direct them accordingly. Thais don’t do this.
I do have an alternative theory about this. I think it has something to do with Thai culture and ‘Face’. They hate to be embarrassed and to lose face in a situation, so they would rather pretend that they didn’t understand than make an interpretation and look silly or be laughed at.
A quick way to understand the tone is if you remember the movie ‘Close Encounters of the Third Kind’, and the tonal signal that the aliens used to communicate with us, apply it to this word; Mai, mai, mai, mai, mai. I’m not comparing it to an intergalactic language, just that I find it as difficult to learn!
Another killer for me was when I was trying to read Thai. It is all clumped together. I am sure there is a good reason for this, other than just to make it as difficult as possible. Perhaps it is an ecological thing, saving that waste of space between words, must save a huge number of trees. ImaginehowdifficultitwouldbeforsomeonelearningEnglishtohavetocutthisintoindividualwords. I think we should ask them nicely to change their ways and do it for us.
I hope I haven’t put you off of learning Thai. You may be one of those that picks it up straight away. There are some great schools and private teachers out there. For the rest of us, it is back to our taxi Thai, so until next time,
Chok Dee and Sawatdee Krap!
